The Doctor Will Ask About Your Gun Now


Big Kahuna Admin
Staff member
Exchange Privileges
Feb 26, 2022
Reaction score
<<<Asking patients about access to firearms and counseling them toward responsible storage could be one part of that. “It’s the same way that we encourage people to wear seat belts and not drive while intoxicated, to exercise,”>>>

I've never ever had a doctor talk to me about seat belts or driving under the influence.

Of course the notion of a presuming a DOCTOR is an "expert" or "authority" on... well... ANYthing related to firearms is no more irrational than presuming him or her to be an expert on the process of refining oil or aeronautics.

I would be inclined to simply answer in the negative. But I will admit it would be FUN to fuck with the doctor.
Last edited:
Or you could take a page from the Steven Wright playbook and when the Dr asks is you have an guns, you reply, "What do you need?"
Love it! (And also a big fan of Steven Wright and Mitch Hedberg.)

I can hear Steven Wright saying that line, "What do you need?" with his deadpan face and delivery in my head!
Doctor: Do you have access to firearms inside or outside the home?


"Why? What do you need?"
Also remind them Medical Malpractice is responsible for the murder of 70,000 humans EVER YEAR in USA. Im twice as likely to be murdered by a doctor then a firearm( human w/firearm)
Last edited:
Also remind them Medical Malpractice is responsible for the murder of 70,000 humans EVER YEAR in USA. Im twice as likely to be murdered by a doctor then a firearm( human w/firearm)
It's actually much higher than that.
I think most of you are thinking this question will be a verbal chat with your doctor the old school way. Remember Covid? They asked you a bunch of questions about Covid before you ever get to see the doctor in larger facilities which is where most medical care has moved. The solo doctors are not around like the 70s and 80s.

These questions will probably be in written form and in your record BEFORE you speak with the doctor so he/she isn't called out on the spot. So you'll probably answer the question in the waiting area up front. Many medical facilities have the written pre-admission tablets in their entry area before you get to see the doctor. The way you answer that quetion will be forwarded and that's assured. If a patient is receiving any type of state funded medical care, particularly when older, the data will be available to alphabet agencies.

So, think about what you might write on one of these forms before you get to your appointment and read the fine print about fraud on the form. As everyone knows, forms on computers can be controlled to not let you go to the next question until you answer the previous question. Not that most care about this, but if you've made it on the radar by the wrong agency due to how you answer the question, and they go sniffing around, they could try and make you a criminal for not telling them the correct answer. Obviously, this you will have to be on their radar for them to do this.

And then of course there is the obvious issues with the Doctor stating that you are not qualified to have guns due to the depression pills you take, or any other number of reasons. Everyone is probably already aware of these. But the data on the forms is the real problem here. It is a backdoor data registration system through the private sector.

edit: one other thing. Forms can have check boxes that only allow you to answer a certain way with no verbal input. I think this is how they will structure that question, so you have to answer it "their" way and not your way in that you lost everything in a boating accident. In fact, this is how most of those questions are asked on those tablets. I went to the doctor this past year. And the stupid questions about gender and Covid are a substantial portion of the pre-admission to the appointment.
Last edited:
they could try and make you a criminal for not telling them the correct answer.

It is not illegal or a crime to lie to a doctor or on a health questionnaire. Doctors are not gov't authorities. Of course, not answering ACTUAL health questions truthfully can be detrimental to your diagnosis and treatment. But there are no statutes regarding honesty or transparency on a health history form or to a health professional in person.

My recommendation is to do what @Michele does... Simple answer: "Nope."
Done and done.
Last edited:
Same answer for "Do you drink alcohol?" Nope :) ignore the USS Enterprise ball cap
best to say moderately. some meds have bad reaction when mixed with alcohol. like if you take statins, you should avoid grapefruit and grapefruit juice. mixing the two can destroy muscle tissue and wreck your kidneys. odd but true.
It's a best practice to make sure your spouse and kids know that if anyone asks if there are guns in the home the answer is always no.
Yup, ha that conversation with wife and kids multiple times since the American Pediatrician associations started that bullshit during the Oblamer Admin! SCROOM!
I think it was back in 2015 but could be earlier, I was asked five pages of questions during a checkup at my doctors. The nurse was the one that asked and told me that they had to ask these for government mandate and report back. Had the same answered none of your business.
I wonder if you answered NO to "Do you have guns?" if they could refuse to treat you if you came in with an accidental gunshot wound? :unsure:

But my take is "what they don't know, can't hurt you". Answer NO on anything incriminatory. Once the cat is out of the bag it is impossible to get him back in... Aren't there HIPA laws about this stuff, anyway? :unsure:

I wonder if there is a directory of Pro2A doctors one could peruse?